The Human Ping Pong Ball

I don’t know how much most people know about Texas, but the general idea is that Texas is an extremely red (republican) state, with two blue (democrat) ‘dots’ in it. Those two cities are Houston and Austin.

Houston is laid back and generally accepting of anything and anyone. Austin, on the other hand, is pretty much full of people who are actively TRYING to “out-weird” each other. Seriously. The city motto is “Keep Austin Weird”.

The point I’m trying to get at is that my girlfriend and I are from Houston; she got offered a University teaching job (she taught for 9 years at the high school level, previously) here in Iowa, which she took, but now there’s a potential job opportunity for her in Austin. I really am not enjoying Iowa as much as I thought I would (there aren’t many cultural or assimilation opportunities and I feel really alone in the area) but at the same time I’m not sure I can handle another move. I think it would make my girlfriend happy to be back in the hot climate and closer to her family and friends, and I think I would like it better than Iowa, but it’s stressing me out just THINKING about the possibility of packing and paying for the move and all the things that go along with it.

However, I think for the time being I will just pretend it doesn’t exist. Even though all I want to do is plan the entire thing out, so I have SOME modicum of control over the situation, I will refrain…because apparently that stresses HER out (when I plan things that haven’t been confirmed yet)…I don’t think she realizes that that is MY way of dealing with my own freak out. I will try to stay calm and not “put the cart before the horse”.

Well…anyways…I’ll keep y’all updated and let you know if I find any good coping strategies.

‘Wrong’ vs. ‘Different’

It’s really hard for me to change my toothbrush, let alone move across the entire country, and yet here I am. Four months ago my girlfriend and I moved to Iowa; she accepted a University teaching position and I am still doing Sign Language Interpreting (it’s a fairly transient natured job so I can find work anywhere and I am always in demand).

I knew it would be extremely difficult for me to assimilate into a completely different culture. People talk different, act different, look different, wear different clothes, place different values on things…just in general DIFFERENT.

I used to say that things were ‘wrong’. I got a replacement phone and it was ‘wrong’, I got a new job and it was ‘wrong’, we moved from Texas to Iowa and it was ‘VERY WRONG”…one day my girlfriend looked at me and said “Is is ‘wrong’? Or is it ‘different'”. Long story short I am trying very hard to use the right word because it helps the people around me more clearly understand what I am feeling.

Moving is hard. It is different. It isn’t wrong.

I’m struggling with it right now but I know that will pass and I will eventually love it as much as I love home. It’s just going to take a LOT more time for that to happen with me than it would with a NT person.